It is a little strange starting a journal, i was taught to never write down my thoughts so they can never be used against me. There is so much i want to write down i just cant figure out where to start.....I guess i could start with how i met Falvir. The priestesses keep asking me how i fell for a man like him, they all thought i would marry a lord or something.
I met Falvir shortly after entering his realm. I was searching for Silver and came across a young man doing his best to fight off a hoard of Carrions. The disgusting creatures had him cornered while he did his best to keep them off the children they were trying to eat. I almost let him die to be honest, i didnt want to get involved in the fight. He was handling himself pretty well and the children were safe. He was very sloppy but it was clear to me he had the skills to survive the encounter. That was until the being leading the creatures entered the battle. It murdered its own minions to reach Falvir. when it did reach him it immediately stabbed him in the back while he dealt with its minions. He didnt fall instead he turned and fought as hard as he could. I should have left him to his fate but something kept me there, maybe it was how he fought with every fiber of his being. It could have been his eyes, They were just like my late queens eyes.
I finally entered the battle when the being leading the creatures tried to rip his eyes out while its minions tore at the rest of Falvirs body. His screams of pain pushed me into action without much thought. I teleported right next to him at the center of the hoard and let out a howl that froze the Carrions in there place. their attention immediately turned to me when their leader spoke. " Slay the wolf and bring me its heart, whoever brings it to me will get this mans body to eat." Falvir hung limp in the beings hands, his body was twisted and broken but he still drew breath. I didnt have much time to think when the creatures descended upon me. I tore through them with steel, fang, and a ferocity only a wolf could have. They all fell before me, their blood flowing around my feet like a river.
Their leader had dropped Falvir by then and set its sights on me. " you are no normal wolf are you girl.....wait... those earrings... i know you! this is wonderful, i get to kill Quenya Drafaylum, daughter of the great wolf. once i am done with you i will finish with the boy." I just smiled at the damned thing and braced myself for its attack. It didnt get the chance to attack me though because Falvir suddenly stood up behind it and drove his broken blade into its head. The being screamed so loud it hurt before it turned to dust, Falvir tried to stay standing but he fell flat onto his face. I couldnt leave him there so i brought him with as i tried to find Silver. Once i did we healed him and then we could not get rid of him. I wont complain about it, i thought he was cute even covered in blood.
If i was being honest i think i fell in love with Falvir the moment i saw him. I had never seen a human fight like him in my life. That and he actually managed to save those children against odds i would have trouble dealing with. Over time we became close friends and i even met his family, unfortunately the life of a Guardian is dangerous. I was there when he lost his family, and was forced to kill his friends. that night changed him and he pushed everyone away. I lost my closest friend for 15 years, he went dark side as some humans might put it. he earned himself a reputation as a brutal slayer that put down his targets without hesitation. I tried to find him and right when i was about to give up he showed up at my door.
He was heavily wounded and barely able to stand, he said hello and something about needing to lay low. I almost pushed him back into the hallway i didnt need the headache he was about to bring me. He always inexplicably found trouble and always ended up dragging me into it. I wish i had kicked him out of my apartment but i took him in. He stayed with me for a week while he healed and it was wonderful, i had my friend back. It is messed up to say but i was so happy to have him to myself. The night he went to leave i would not let him. That was also the night we became lovers, after that he returned to the Guardians and we fooled around from time to time. that was 30 years ago now,some might call him a rogue or a scoundrel but i dont care. He is my rogue and scoundrel, despite him making me mad he still makes me laugh. I never want to be apart from him. I will love him for as long as i live, if he passes from this world a piece of me will go with him.
This next entry into Quenyas journal is what is happening to her while she is in a coma.
Darkness, all that could be seen was darkness. Quenya looked around in fear, she was unsure of where she was. She no longer felt her connection to Silver or feel the life growing inside of her. It was not the void, she could not feel her people or any of the other denizens of the void. The realization of being truly alone lead to a rather nasty panic attack. Quenya might have been a force to be reckoned with and unshakeable in combat being completely alone was her worst fear.
While in her panicked state she started running. Everything may have been black, the world still felt…familiar and solid. She screamed for Silver, Falvir, anyone honestly. She pushed her mind as far out as she could to find anything in the vast empty space she found herself in. She ran until her legs gave out and she fell flat on her face. The screams and broken hearted wails she sent into the emptiness just echoed back at her making her cry, and scream harder as she curled into a ball.
Her voice gave out eventually and her mind went blank as one thought repeated itself. “ Is this what death truly feels like?” She always thought it would be far more pleasant, she knew the god she followed was real and had a place for her followers. Then again she did some horrible things in the pursuit of peace. Her existence was full of death as she destroyed her enemies with such glee. That was it she was in a place just for monsters, a fitting place to be she felt. Quenya refused to move for what felt like months as she silently accepted the fact she was a monster and deserved this fate. The only thing that pulled her out of her depression even for a moment was a strange pressure on her side. Every now and again Quenya felt like someone was pushing on her side and whispering to her. It was too quiet to hear the words being spoken, it was like trying to listen to the wind. The more it happened the more she paid attention. She uncurled from the ball she made herself into, When she did that the words finally came to her.
Whenever she felt the pressure she heard Vincent telling her to wake up, sometimes it was accompanied by Silver's voice as he read to her. Whenever she heard her friends voice it broke her heart, even though she could hear him, their connection was broken and she could not feel his presence. The brief connections she received from the real world convinced her that she was not dead, at least not yet. That meant she could get out of whatever was going one, Quenyas mind raced as she tried to figure out what had happened. Any thoughts of the fight were forgotten almost like she had never been in the fight.
Eventually Quenya realized she was not alone, how she had not seen it before was astonishing. Then again maybe that one glimmer of life she felt had just appeared. It mattered not. she was no longer alone. She refused to jump to her feet at first, instead Quenya rolled to look at whatever was there. A man sat nearby with a table and chairs and what smelled like tea and some kind of food. Her stomach growled loudly and the man just laughed. Quenya narrowed her eyes on him, she could not tell what race he was, he looked human but he smelled and felt alien. His laughter did not echo like her cries had, it was soft and melodic and it drew her in. What the hell was he? “ Come and eat with Quenya, I am sure you are starving. You might be a soul but you still have to eat. This tea will also stop the pain in your legs.” the mention of her leg pain brought it right back into her mind and she almost screamed in pain. She had not used them in so long they felt like stone. Her groans of pain seemed to have an effect on the man but she could not be sure. The moment she squeaked and held back a scream Quenya could have sworn the corners of his mouth twitched like he was fighting a smile.
She wanted to just tear into the man instead of eating with him, there was something strange about him and she did not like it. It took a few minutes to compose herself and get her legs to move properly but that did not seem to bother the man. He just poured himself a cup of tea and picked through some of the food on the table before finding some grapes to eat. He just ate and sipped his tea patiently. No more words were spoken until Quenya stood up and joined him at the table. The moment she sat down the man poured her a cup of tea before pushing a rather large turkey leg towards her. It had not been there before, it just appeared out of thin air making her even more nervous. Quenya eyed the turkey leg as she sipped the tea, It was Phoenix tea from her home realm. Her look of confusion got another laugh from the man before he asked her a question. “ Where do you think you are right now Quenya? A smart woman like you should have figured it out by now, maybe you are wondering how i know your name? “
How did he know what she was thinking? It was like he could read her mind or something, whatever he was doing she hoped what she said next would throw them off. “ I believe i am currently sitting in what could be called deaths waiting room. It is a place those in a coma typically go. When it comes to how you know my name thats an easy one, you are in my head so you would know my name as easily as i breath.” Her words didnt shake the man; he just laughed again and poured himself some more tea. “ Not bad Quenya, then again I figured the only child of the great wolf Hansa would figure it out. Unfortunately you are only half right, we are not in “ deaths waiting room.” We are in the realm for monsters like you, this place is where people are sent when they piss off mother.”
The mention of being rejected by the god she followed cut her deep and almost sent her back into a fit of tears. She managed to fight the urge by grabbing the turkey leg and taking a large bite. It tasted so good, the seasoning was mouth watering and the meat fell off the bone. It was made just how her foster mother Rose used to make it. She lost all sense of manners and tore into the leg, the mixture of hunger and the memories of her lost friend had all of her attention. That was at least until the man mentioned her unborn children. “ i know this is going to be hard to hear but you have a decision to make, you can keep fighting for your life and risk the children, or you could just give in and pass on and give them a chance to live.”
Quenya growled at the man and stood up so fast she knocked the chair, she pointed what remained of the turkey leg at him. Most of it was gone by now and all the was left was some small chunks of meat and a very sharp tip. She bit through the bone to get the marrow and the result was a sharp point she could kill someone with. “ My children will be just fine asshole as long as i am still alive my friends will figure out a way to get me back. If they are unable to they will make sure my children are delivered safely. Even the mother is not heartless enough to punish children for the mothers sins.” She got no response from the man beyond him standing up and smoothing out his tunic. “ I guess that is all for today, keep the tea and food I know you will be needing it.” His disappearance left her feeling like he had never been standing there. If the food and drink had not been there Quenya would have called herself crazy.
The darkness pressed in on her again with the disappearance of the man, it felt heavier this time and she regretted becoming aggressive towards the man. It was incredibly nice of his to leave the tea and food for her. She was still so hungry it was hard to think beyond thoughts of food. Quenya righted the chair to sit down but she hesitated, the feeling of something being off came back in full force. She looked around for a moments before turning back to the food. She was proven right when she gazed at the table of food. Everything was rotten and maggot covered, A new person sat at the table as well. It was rotten and maggot covered just like the food. They were disgusting to look at, The being before her didnt speak. It just looked at her blankly as it ate the rotted food like nothing was wrong. Whatever it ate appeared back on the table. The look in its eyes was crazed but it only grew worse when it gazed upon Quenya, It smiled and opened its mouth to speak except it just spit out maggots everywhere.
“ what is going on right now.” It was all Quenya could get out before the disgusting being attacked her. Its appearance was awful but somehow the smell made it past her senses. It hit her full force when the beings hands wrapped around her throat before forcing her to the ground. The things grip was intense for being a muscleless skeleton. It squeezed so hard it felt like Quenyas neck was going to snap. Her vision started to fade as she fought back only her body felt far to heavy to move. Every punch or kick felt like she was dragging it through mud, when she gave up fighting back the abomination strangling her vomited maggots into her face before it managed to speak. It was only one word and it was enough to give her the will to stay awake. “ Trap” was all the thing said before it was gone and the man was back and angrier than ever. His calm demeanor was gone, replaced with anger, and rage. “ What the hell do you think you are doing summoning something like that here. It could have killed you and your children would definitely die with you.”
Quenya tried to catch her breath as she shook her head, when she could speak it was quick and almost pleading. “ i didnt do it i swear, it was just sitting there at the table. Please don't leave me again.” The man smiled and picked Quenya up, when he let go of her hand she was sitting at the table again and all the same food and tea was still at the table. She hid her disgust when she noticed a few pieces of food were slowly starting to rot with the passage of time. Whatever was going on was not good, every moment in that dark place was slowly chipping away at her mind and the mans appearances seemed to make it worse. She had only seen him twice but it was clear he was not what he seemed. Her attention turned to the man as he spoke of things he should not have known.
“ the last time i was here we spoke about how you met Falvir, no Ryker is his name. Falvir is just the alias he took as a guardian. You were saying how he almost died trying to defend those children, it made me think. I have a question, do you think he would do that for you and those children? If he did against Elmryia you would not be in the situation, from what you told me he was going to let you die.” She could not help the look of disgust and confusion on her face from that. She knew he would never have let her die, if he did he would not have shattered his soul to save her. She did not remember much about the fight but she remembered what he did. The love of her life broke off a piece of his own soul to keep her alive. If he had not done that she would have died for sure. The man kept speaking completely oblivious to the fact she was furious. “ You also mentioned how terrible of a father you think Silver is, and from the sounds of it he is. He often dumps the poor child off on other people for days on end as he goes galavanting around the kingdom. When he is home he ignores the poor child, it amazes me you could be friends with that man.” that was the last straw for her, Quenya flipped the table and grabbed the man. It was the only time her body moved without being weighed down. She grabbed the man by the throat and tried to squeeze, her hands refused to respond and he just smiled at her.
“ Oh my, I guess that is all true or you would not be so angry. You need to let this world go and move onto the next. Let the power of your wondrous soul move onto the next life and supply another the same powers ....” He wanted to say more except his attention was turned to a voice echoing through the darkness. “ Hey Quenya, its me, Raine. I am sorry I have not visited until now, I was bringing Vincent home since Silver had to take an emergency mission. The little bugger teleported me here. It seems he wanted to say hello again.” Vincent's voice entered the mix and it broke her heart. “ Hello.” It was all he had really learned to say beyond a couple dozen words. Raines voice took over again and the man's head turned so hard his neck snapped and his head pointed perfectly in line with the middle of his back.
“ I am not sure you can hear me. I hope you can though. Silver came by the library today looking for books about the runes on your neck. I recognized them from our training to hunt Black Witches, the runes match with something I had in my old gear, it was the story of Archmage Rook and how he lost his children. I forgot i even had this book, The sisters always told me this book was junk, it saved our butts more often than not though. I know you remember when we figured out it was a spell book in disguise. The writer mentions something about a spell like this and how it was the real reason the archmage lost his children. ”Its hard to translate though, you were always the one with the ear for languages.
“ Behold the great gift of sleep upon the kingdom, The sleep that all beings earn at the end of a long life. Let their souls move on and be power for another in the chain, If death desires it the small shall be chosen so they can live a better life beyond the veil of time. Behold the gift of sleep, deaths only peace.” Raine fell silent for a moment before saying more. “I have no clue if this has relevance. Rook has a note after that, it mentions something about giving in and allowing your soul to be taken. It almost reads like whatever this spell requires….” the man shrieked, causing Raines voice to disappear. The mans composure was broken now it seemed so to did his appearance. His head stayed pointing behind him while the rest of the body turned into a wriggling mass of severed lines and blood.
A set of hands grabbed Quenyas and forced them off his neck before he spoke again. His hypnotizing voice was replaced with a strange screaming that struck fear into Quenyas heart. “ I guess i need to force your to realize its is pointless to hang onto a life where no one truly loved you.” the man attacked her but just like the rotting corpse it disappeared and they were suddenly sitting at the table again. It was like nothing ever happened, Quenya even started to doubt that it did. The food was no longer rotting and the man seemed annoyed. “ If you are just going to ignore me maybe i should come back later.” He tried to stand up only to have Quenya grab his hand. “ Please stay, i wont ignore you again.” He smiled and nodded as he sat down again. He was falling right into her hands.
“ i will ask my question one more time, what is your decision, let your soul drift in the chain and save the children, or cling to nothing and let them die. I can feel how they wither in your belly and silently cry out for it to stop.” His words cut her deep, Quenya knew her children were fine. She managed to drag up a memory of Senka telling her the children are fine before it cut out and she was alone again. Quenya forced herself to cry as she answered. “ please just let me see their faces just once before i make my decision, if i am to die then i want their faces to be the last thing i see. Please.”
Her tears worked as the man wiped his own and nodded. “ you will hold them before your soul finally slips from the world. I have one final question before I unfortunately have to go. What do you know of soul transference, i only ask for research of my own. It would be a shame for a mind like yours to leave without imparting one last piece of knowledge.” The question of magic was surprising but it gave Quenya a glimmer of hope, if she could use magic she could get out. “ I cannot explain it to you and then i would need to practice. My knowledge in that area is fuzzy it has been a long time. Is it alright if i show you?”
Her mysterious friend hesitated before agreeing and leaning back. It took her a few minutes to focus and even then she could not cast a spell. It was almost like her mana was not there. Then it was when the man mumbled something into his tea. “ What is he playing at? That was a spell, is he keeping me here.” That was all she could think before she cast the spell she needed. It was not the spell he wanted to see though, instead she cast a spell that should have allowed her to speak telepathically to anyone nearby. The moment the spell was cast she could feel Senka nearby and she managed to get out a few words. “ Senka, i am trapped in madness and look forward to the peace of sleep just like rook.” Her spell was ended as the man stood up and punched her across the face.
“ you are dead just accept that already. I think i will let a friend in to convince you of that.” The stranger disappeared and was replaced by the rotting corpse that spoke to her before. Quenyas heart stopped for a moment in fear but the creature didnt move, instead it spoke clearly and sat on the floor. “ that was clever Quenya, I am glad you are figuring this out now. Otherwise you would be like me after awhile. Your little stunt caused that demon to loose control on me for the moment. Now before you ask, i know your name from him, and who i am is an easy one. I am ArchMage Rook. I let myself get taken to get my children's souls back, I failed at that. I have even failed at helping others like you, this time i feel will be different.” Rook picked through the food until he found some carrots and ate a few. “ Oh god how i missed real food, Eating all that rotten crap is torture. I am a vegetarian so all the meat make make sick but its what i have.”
He ate a few carrots in silence before he took a drink and cleared his throat. “ it has been so long since I could talk that it hurts. I dont have long so i need you to do something for me. I know you can still use your magic, he didnt take it away when he stormed off. Use a soul spell on me, i know you know a few. I smell Drafaylum blood in you, the spell you must use will allow me to travel through this…hell for lack of a better term. If you do that I can help you.” Quenya wanted to argue but she was willing to do anything to get out of there. She knew something was off but there was more to the story, she needed more information. The task of freeing herself was keeping Quenya from falling into another pit over despair and never wanting to leave this place.
She struggled to remember what spell she knew to use but it was like something kept pulling her memories out of her skull and dulling her mind. She could gather the mana she needed to cast the spell but she could not come up with the spell, eventually she gave up and looked at Rook with a defeated look. “ I don't know what is going on, I cannot remember the spell I need. Its like something keeps taking them away from me. I'm sorry I wish I could help and I really want to just…” Quenya sighed and let her hands fall into her lap as she struggled to explain what was going on. Rook did not seem bothered by it and just took the news in stride. “ That is alright, I remember what it was like when I was first trapped here. It will all come back but this needs to happen now.”
he fell silent and thought for a moment before his face brightened, at least that is what Quenya thought, his eyes were up and some maggots fell off his face like he was smiling. “ You used telepathy to contact your friend did you not? Connect with me and i think i can help, be warned though my thoughts are rather….Disgusting from centuries of being trapped here. Once you do this i need you to promise me that whenever that vile “ man “ comes around you pretend you cant remember anything.”
Rook held out one of his hands for her to take, almost like he trusted her completely. It was rare someone willingly let a telepath into their minds. He held his hand out even as Quenya fidgeted in her chair. She was worried if she connected with him bad things would happen, that was the pattern in this place. Every time she was shown kindness it was immediately replaced by malice and pain. Rook noticed her hesitation and did his best to sooth her uncertainty. “ Nothing will happen that has not already happened my dear. I am the best chance you have of defeating that man and getting out of here. You wont have you mana for long that is guaranteed. Connect with me and lets get you out of here.” She sighed and took rook's hand before starting the connection with him.
The moment the connection was made Quenyas mind was filled with horrific images of Rook terrifying and killing others trapped in this strange world. The torrent of memories made it incredibly difficult to keep track of her own thoughts. She felt all of his sadness, and rage at the situation he was in. How much he grieved in forced silence whenever he had to torture the poor souls trapped by the man they were about to fight. His memories shifted suddenly after a few minutes to his life before being trapped in the darkness. He was beloved, a pillar of hope for his small city amidst a war they wanted no part of.
He fought off all familiar threats to Quenya, the Carrions, and the Black Witches at the same time. He fought bravely with his people and helped turn the tide of many battles, he thought he had ensured the safety of those he loved until his children were taken by the witches. He hunted them to the ends of their home world until he came face to face with someone they both recognized. Elmryia Fang, the queen of the Black Witches. Their battle lasted for the better part of a day, Neither of them were able to get the upper hand. That was until Elmryia brought out Rooks children, she did not bargain with him she trapped them in the same world Rook and Quenya were in now. Rook tried to give his life for theirs, and Elmryia agreed, she never released them and tortured him for centuries. His memories changed again to when the strange man appeared. He introduced himself as the new warden of this world, he thought Rook was completely broken so he told him secrets he should have never divulged. One of those secrets was what Rook imparted to Quenya. He taught her how to hold onto her memories and a small sliver of her mana if the man ever took hers again.
When Quenya finally released his hand Rook suddenly attacked her, the punch he landed on her face took Quenya by surprise and threw her off the chair she was sitting in. The last thing she heard from him through their connection was full of sorrow. “ I am so sorry about this Quenya, he is coming back and i need to do this or the jig is up.” She just nodded and let Rook mercilessly beat her for a few moments before he was gone and the man stood over her. “ It seems our mutual friend is losing his grip on what he needs to do, I will correct that later though. I need to show you something.” The man picked her up and they were suddenly standing in the room Quenya and Falvir were sleeping in. “ they are letting the two of you rot here, alone. They cant help what is helping what is happening to either of you. I can though.” Quenya looked at her body and she looked so sickly and thin it hurt to look, Falvir was the same.
Her eyes drifted back to her body and noticed how much her belly had grown in the time she was trapped in that world. She looked like she was ready to give birth any day now, it made her wonder how long she had been trapped. It had to have been months, she remembered only being a couple months pregnant when she married the love of her life. She watched herself in silence until Senka entered the room to check on them. Quenyas perspective looked like she was barely even paying attention to Falvir or herself. The elf checked on the babies with a quick spell before leaving the room. What Quenya did not know was what the man was doing to her mind, She might have seen a frail and sickly woman but in reality she was as healthy as could be. Her skin was bright like she would wake up at any moment and Falvir was being looked over by a student at the academy. She still looked like she was ready to give birth and it confused Senka to no end.
The man showed Quenya that Senka just walked out of the room like she did not care at all. The reality of the situation was the elf was doing her best to figure out why the babies had grown so rapidly in such a short time. It was the strange man's doing, whatever spell Quenya was under was also forcing her children to grow at a faster rate. He was showing her what he wanted her to see and it was affecting Quenya deeply. She had all of her memories back but she was still at his mercy as far as what she saw and experienced. They stood there in silence until the man leaned down and whispered into her ear. “ They are forgetting about you already and are just waiting for the babies to be born before they end it. You are just an incubator now so they can steal your children and raise them with no memory of their parents. Your so called friends want nothing more to do with you.”
He pulled Quenya back into the darkness the moment she started to sob and fall her to knees, it was there that he left her. Completely alone and struggling to come to terms with what was going on. He was making it feel like there was not way out for her, that even if she tried to get out of this it world be pointless. She cried for who knows how long until Rook was suddenly back into the room, the man was with them for just long enough to watch Rook start beating Quenya again. The second the man was gone Rook stopped and helped Quenya to her feet. “ I have some news for you Quenya, your children are going to be born soon. I am sure it is way to soon for that but he cant have their souls. Not only are they too young to agree but they are being protected by your father. He has been watching over their souls like a hawk, all our vile friend was able to sneak by him was a rapid aging spell. He is running out of time to break you. Elmryia has been wounded too much to even function properly thanks to your friend Silver, Her fight with him left her at death's door and she needs your soul to heal faster. The ....” Rook screamed in sudden pain as the man reappeared and stabbed Rook through the chest. “ So you are the reason she won't break Rook, I had hoped that was not the case. I am going to have to kill you permanently and then do the same to Quenya. Those children can be damned and suffocate in their mothers womb.”
He threw Rook to the side so he could move onto Quenya, she was ready for him though. He was met with a blast of white light that burned away the image he was holding on his body. The light revealed what he truly was. The man was a Carrion and a rather powerful one, he had a vaguely human body except for the mass of tentacles coming out of his back. “ You are in my world Quenya, and I always win.” Quenyas battle for freedom finally started in earnest in the darkness but in the real world problems were arising. When she started her battle against the man her body in the real world reacted. Quenyas body started to thrash like she was having a seizure and her water broke. Senka was there when everything started and she immediately called for help. The elf knew time was of the essence and she needed every pair of hands she could get to make sure both Quenya and her children survived.
( This will be continued at a later day; this is just what had happened over the couple months since Quenya and her husband Falvir were put into a coma.)